Saturday, May 31, 2008

Racing Towards the Finish Line

I was trying to watch the premiere of the new Venture Brothers season (it's amazing by the way) on Adult Swim's website, and I had to sit through a Navy commercial first. It was kind of like this one:



I'm sure I'm not the first person to point this out (YouTube tells me this commercial was posted a year ago), but is it really wise for any armed service to advertise under the slogan "Accelerate Your Life"? Especially in war time?
They might as well just say "Navy: die earlier than most people!"

ps. Go Team Venture!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Sigur Rós Steals Public's Thunder by Pre-Emptively Naming New Single "Gobbledigook" (also nudity!)

File this one in the "Everyone who cares already knows but I'm writing about it anyway" category.


Anyone who knows me that well knows that I love Sigur Rós. If the concert poster in my room didn't tip you off (maybe you should come up to my bedroom more often, wink wink), then my three SR t-shirts should have done the trick. So I was thrilled when I got a mailing list e-mail from them today announcing that their new album will be available on June 23rd and that their first single from it and the accompanying video were now on their website.

I had known the album was coming up but I was really excited about the video. Every Sigur Rós video so far (including the documentary) has been absolutely amazing. The clip for Glosoli is one of my favorite videos of all time. Here it is:



Anyway, the new track is fantastic but the video is really intriguing. While the band has been releasing pictures of naked people in trees for a couple weeks now, I was still surprised by the video which features non-stop full frontal nudity as a bunch of people dance around a forest naked as if the cast of a production of Hair did a musical version of Lord of the Flies.

It's pretty crazy and I give them points for upping my boobie and giney count for the day (which was currently at zero so don't worry, Sam). However, I do take umbridge with the one dude who is skinny and has long hair like a chick. It's like watching the end of The Crying Game whenever he turns around.

Anywho, check out the video and song here. I love this band.

"Gobbledigook" - Sigur Ros

"Babies Don't Need a Vacation but I Still See Them at the Beach"

I was watching a TV show today and it had a baby in it and I started wondering: whose job is it to make the babies cry when filming movies? Because, y'know, babies don't read scripts.

Do you think they use poking sticks or something?

The Last Man on Earth - HunchBack

Sunday, May 25, 2008

"I Have Seen the Future and It Does Not Work"

So this is the movie I saw last night:



It features Sean Connery in a red diaper saving a civilization by raping and murdering its inhabitants and has an entire sequence where women in bandannas (including Charlotte Rampling) do experiments to find out what gives him a boner.

It opens with a guy with a drawn on goatee talking about magic. It then segues to a giant, floating rock head who says this, "The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!"

And the craziest part: it was actually kind of good.

Zardoz is pleased.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

The Fantastic Career of Shia LaBeouf

So I went to see the new Indiana Jones last night at midnight. I mean, of course I did. Does anyone remember my Halloween costume a couple of years ago?


Anywho, the movie was a lot of fun. My basic view was that it was a "great" movie downgraded to a "very good" movie because of one element. Call me an Indy purist, but the maguffin is supposed to be religious in an Indiana Jones movie, not...what it was. The stuff at the end just didn't fit the series and frankly was disappointing.
Other than those 10 minutes in the climax however, I had an absolute time. Then again, take my opinion with a grain of salt. I wore a damn official Indiana Jones fedora to the screening. I'm a fan.

After the movie we all started discussing the filmography of Shia LaBeouf and soon enough one thing became clear: Shia is making his career decisions based on the fantasies of a 14 year old boy circa 1986.
So, with that in mind, I have now begun work on the next Shia LeBeouf vehicle entitled Shia's Excellent Adventure. The movie opens on Shia hooking up with his incredibly hot girlfriend when suddenly Doc Brown, Luke Skywalker, and Chunk fly down in the Delorean and tell him he's the chosen one who has to come to the future to save John Connor's rec center from being closed by evil robotic real estate developers and Freddy Kreuger. It ends with a climactic break dance sequence/laser shoot-out. And, since it takes place in a fantasy, everyone can pronounce the name "LeBeouf".


It's gonna be mega awesome.

P.S. Here's the full size version of the poster.
P.S. If anyone wants to write, draw, or photoshop some more scenes from this masterpiece, go ahead and send them bitches in.

Indiana Jones Theme - John Williams

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Sorrow in Atlantic City (and on the way there)

Today was the official table read for Sorrow Hill, the horror movie I got a supporting role in (as an insane asylum patient who threatens to rape not one, but two of the female leads!). It was a whole lot of fun since everyone involved is great, I'm a horror junkie, and, while I don't have that many lines, all of them are fucking awesome! There's just something so much fun about put on a "crazy" voice and saying things like "You're the one that killed mama!" and "Is she gonna be the new breeder?"


God, I can't wait to start this movie.


There were a couple of problems however. First off, I got the third degree for cutting my hair. The script called specifically for my character to have "long, ratty hair" and that was something I completely forgot about when I shaved it all off. For some perspective, this is what I looked like at my audition:


And here's what I look like now:

Oops.
Fortunately the director, Ron, got over his intitial displeasure fairly quickly and we began discussing alternative plans (guess who's probably going wig shopping!)

Anyway, the other problem I had was during my treks to and from the read. It was held at the filming location which, if you've been reading this blog, you'll remember being the extremely creepy abandoned half of the Atlantic City Race Track. This is about an hour and 45 minute drive from my house in Hopewell and the best part is I get to drive through Main Street Hammonton!

Hammonton is some small town right by the entrance to the Expressway I needed and every year they hold this little awesome thing called "Cruisin' Main Street"! Now what this is is a day where the whole town pretends that they're the set of American Grafitti 2 and everyone with an old fashioned car drives up and down this mile long stretch called Main Street. Sound fun? Well, the real fun is had by the people who don't have old fashioned cars. They get to sit there and watch the people drive up and down this mile long stretch called Main Street. Whoopee!
To give you an idea, here are some super cool pictures from the Hammonton Cruisin' Classics Auto Club website of the 2006 celebration:

Anyway, this awesome, awesome event was being held today and when I was on my way to the table read (and running late of course) I got stuck for 10 minutes driving that one mile stretch because people were setting up. Then, on my way home, I stupidly drove back there and ended up right in the middle of things.
Here's how it went down: I was driving along, enjoying the new Frightened Rabbit CD, when, all of a sudden, I looked around and noticed that all the cars around me had slowed down. Not only had they slowed down, but they were all at least five decades old. That was weird enough, but when I looked outside, I saw that there were people lining the streets, staring at me. And some of them were wearing poodle skirts.
Man, I hope my 2001 Honda Accord really impressed them.
It's too bad I wasn't a few hours earlier, because the Hammonton News informs me that I missed a Hula Hoop contest and a "Dancexplosion performance," whatever the fuck that is.

And y'know, here I thought that sitting in a circle and threatening to cut a girl's tongue out in a southern accent would be the weirdest part of my day.

Anywho, as we break in the swing of the things with the Sorrow Hill shooting, I'll keep y'all informed of how it's going via this blog thing. Until then, enjoy this little nugget that Ron passed on to me today. The pair of eyes in the banner at the top of his Grindhouse Pictures site are actually mine from a still photograph we took during the trailer shoot.
How about that?

Friday, May 16, 2008

Senior Citizen

So the school year ended. I am now a senior in college. I am forced to confront the fact that the utter terror that is the real world is a very concrete and nearby future. And I don't even get a prom to soften the blow this time!
However, to take my mind off that, both theater groups I'm involved with at Rutgers had their annual awards ceremonies!

For those of you that don't know, the Cappies (College Avenue Players) and the Cabaret Ball (Cabaret Theatre) are the annual back-pat-a-thon/circle-jerks that we in the theater community throw to help celebrate how awesome we are by giving out awards. And by drinking and wearing goofy costumes.
And now a run down (with pictures!):

The Cappies
Last year's CAP awards ceremony was kind of lame. The theme sucked ("Mythological creatures"? What the fuck?) and we were stuck in the tiny basement of Tumultis on George Street. This year, however was much better. We were at the local elk's lodge and the theme was "Classy 80s Coke and Whore Party" which was a shit-load more fun. Plus I was 21 this time!

In the end, Wacky Hijinks won Best Show which was pretty damn exciting. It would have been even more exciting had 7/8 of the cast all been on the voting committee. But whatever, we won! Whoo!


The Cast of Hijinks (minus Dave)


Next came the after party which was at Jamie and Holly's house and was a Rubics Cube Party. For those of you that don't know, a RCP is when everyone comes wearing all different colors and keep trading until they are wearing only one. I ended up completing seven damn colors (all of a rubics cube plus black) and I only ruined two girls' shirts in the process.
















Halfway through, someone asked me why I was getting so into the game. I told them it was because I had a girlfriend now so there really wasn't anything else to do at a party.


By the end of the night, things devolved into a pantsless dance party both inside and out. This may have been based on my suggestion and campaigning. At least that's what people tell me. I don't remember.

All in all, a fun night.




The Cabaret Ball
My freshmen year, the Cabaret Ball was absolutely amazing. Then last year, it sucked. I blame that mostly on the fact that the theme was "Dress as a drink". What on earth does that mean? I ended up throwing bunny ears on and carrying a hammer. I was a Harvey Wallbanger.

This year the theme was a little bit more interesting. It was "Guilty Pleasures". It took me forever to come up with something and then finally I had the perfect costume. I went as the movie Love Actually. See:

Basically, I didn't know how to dress up as lesbian porn.
Ha! You think that's gross, try this:


Anyway, my costume was simple and also a big hit with the ladies. I was making hearts melt left and right with my actual love. Here are the pictures:

One with Sam
One with Rachel
One with Maddie
One with Jade

One with Ali

And one with...uh...Bassem

In the end, Hair won Best Show which was pretty damn exciting. It would have been even more exciting had we not had the biggest cast and therefore the biggest voting block. But whatever, we won! Whoo!
Then the after party where, I don't know, we all drank more.



Wrap-Up


Anywho, junior year was a really great year for me. I became much closer with a really great group of people and we worked hard and created some great stuff. And now I have a cute girl whose butt I can grab at any time without getting in trouble. Much love, Sam!

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I don't want to leave college. Oh God, I don't want to leave college.

Random Comic Fun!

Like many fans of the mediocrity museum that is the newspaper comics page, I was very confused to see a Vampire Weekend reference in today's "Sally Forth".


You see, I had always imagined that SF was drawn by some woman in her forties and I really didn't expect the characters to start mentioning popular indie rock bands.

I got even more confused when I headed over to the A.V. Club and was informed that "Sally Forth" had previously made a reference to ...And You Will Know Us by the Trail of the Dead.

A bit of investigating led me to the blog of SF writer Francesco Marciulano and a quick perusal of it leads me to believe that he's a much hipper guy than I would have ever believed from actually reading "Sally Forth".

Anyway, the real reason I'm writing this is to post this pretty cool video he made for his other strip Medium Large.

Back Home Again

Well, I'm back at the old homestead for a bit. So, to celebrate, here's a clip from some trashy show profiling a murder that happened less than a mile from my house!



Ah, the fun. My favorite part is how they made my town sound like some Desperate Housewives bullshit. "Hopewell; a town full of hope and, well, lots of money." Jesus Christ. I guess they can't bother with good writers on a network that changed its name from Court TV to TruTV so they could get away with airing nothing but reality shows.
They do realize that the rich areas of Hopewell are only one part, right? For instance, I was in a local bar this evening called Hillbilly Hall. I really don't think the average patrons of said bar are driving home in S Classes.

Anywho, I was going through my blog posts the other day and I noticed that I haven't posted a song to download recently, so here's a little overdue treat.

Song I'm Currently Obsessed With: Frightened Rabbit - Keep Yourself Warm


And here's another song too. This one is in this month's playlist and Holly's been begging me to get her an mp3 so here we go: Calvin Harris - Colours

Monday, May 12, 2008

"I Am the Wackiest of the Hijink."

"Live from Scott Hall, it's Wacky Hijinks...night!"























Thus began Wacky Hijinks 2008, some of the most fun I've ever had in college theater.

Well, ok, that's not exactly how it began. The show actually begins with 10 seconds of Andy drinking coffee followed by a sketch about Bear Fights, a secret organization of people who go out into the wilderness to regain their primal instincts (and fight bears), but this video was, I suppose, the official opening. It was edited by Adam and was one of the first signs I had that this show would be pretty darn good.

While I contributed a sketch freelance-style to Wacky Hijinks 2006, last year's show was my first as an official member of CAP's exclusive 8-member sketch troupe. It was a tumultous year with a lot of people butting heads but we came together in the end and ended up with an amazing show (those YouTube videos really don't do it justice).

When it came time to start working on this year's show, I was really worried about failing to live up to Hijinks 2007. We had lost our most senior member (Mena) and most prolific writer (Adam N.) and even our most aesthetically pleasing members (Mike and Nicole), yet people kept telling us that they were more excited for this year's show than they had been in a while. A voice in the back of my mind kept telling me we were gonna blow it. However, I told that voice to shut up and got ready to work.

Then the writer's block hit.

For almost a month, right in the prime writing season, I was incapable of coming up with anything funny. Well, that's not exactly accurate. It was more like I was incapable of finding anything funny. Any idea I came up with I would instantly shoot down. Any idea anyone else came up with I would shoot down. Even ideas I had written down and loved two weeks earlier I now hated. It was as if I had lost my entire sense of humor.

I remember the peak of it, where I was at this writing meeting with Zach, Greg, and Adam and I was just acting like a black hole of comedy, absolutely ripping apart anyone's material including my own. The worst part was that it was Adam's first real writing meeting and I was sure that, because of me, he would quit within the week.

Finally this period ended and I was able to start churning out sketches again and enjoy other people's. And enjoy them I did! We quickly amassed some of my favorite scenes and bits I've ever been involved in. I was sure the show would be great. And I remained sure until tech week where I again developed the same sense of dread that I gotten before every show this year (especially the other one I co-wrote, Zipperface!!?!).

And, just like Zipperface!!?! before it, all my fears turned out to be completely unfounded. The audiences loved the show and it was an absolutely amazing time. But even better than that, I really got close to the people involved. We hung out every day for the past couple of months at rehearsal and then spent hours together every night up in my attic. When we had problems during tech, we never fought or argued. Everything was nice and smooth and I have to say it was one of the best creative experiences I've ever had. It was the pinnacle of this mounting feeling I've had all year that I've surrounded myself with people who are really talented and who really make each other better through proximity.

This is something that will be put to the test soon enough when we try to start our own website. But, more on that when the time comes...

Anyway, back to Hijinks. Here are some more pictures of the show, most of which were taken by Darya on closing night. Once video becomes available, I'll post that here as well.